As you enter Jones Elementary School, you will see a bulletin board that reads, “I Am a Jones Student! I Am What I Choose!” We believe “I am what I choose” is a true statement for all of us. One of the most important skills a child must learn is how to make wise choices.
Most adults understand that who we become is a consequence of the multitude of choices we have made in our lives. We have made important choices about education, careers, relationships, where we will live, and our values and beliefs. Through life experiences and observing the results of the choices of others, we have learned that those who make the wisest choices are more likely to experience greater joy and success than those who do not.
None of us are born “skilled and wise” choice makers. Young children are inclined to making choices without a lot of skill and wisdom. This is primarily because wise choice making is like any other life skill, requiring proper training and lots of practice. The connection between our choices and consequences must be learned. What are some ways for helping children learn how to make good choices? Here are some suggested strategies that can be used both in the classroom and at home.
1. Allow Children to Make Choices – While it is often easier to choose for children rather than allow them to decide for themselves, the lessons learned by making good and bad choices help children become responsible, independent adults. Take time to offer choices and create situations for choice, reinforcing the importance of good choice.
2. Limit Choices – Keep the number and types of choices within a reasonable limit and be sure they are age appropriate. Provide allowable choices to create a situation where they experience success at making good choices.
3. Discuss Options – When faced with choices, discuss the options with children to help them understand why one choice is better than another. Guiding children through these choices teaches them how to make decisions for themselves.
4. Consider Other People – When decisions involve other people, discuss how a choice will affect others. Helping them learn how to apply “the golden rule” in their choices will help build empathy for others.
5. Use Past Choices as Opportunities – When children make a bad choice, use the opportunity to discuss why the choice was bad. Ask them what other choices could have been made.
6. Praise Good Choices – When children make good choices, acknowledge that you know what they chose. Ask them to share what thought processes they went through in making the decision. Share with them why you believe the choice(s) were good.
7. State When There Is No Choice – Some situations which are safety issues have no choices. 8. Help Children Take Responsibility for Their Choices - Allow children to experience the natural and logical consequences of the choices they make.
When we teach children they have the power to choose and to make good choices, we will do much to help them understand more fully that, “I am what I choose!”
Mitch Miller is principal of Jones Elementary School.